The formal aspects of Buddhist practice – the things you can look at and identify as “Buddhist practice” – are very important. These include meditation, Dharma study, and time with Sangha. However, unless you’re a monk in a really strict monastery, over 90% of your time is spent outside of formal practice. It’s important to remember that practice each and every moment – how we choose to live our life, just as it is – is the most important thing.
Quicklinks to Article Content:
My Practice Hasn’t Been Very Good Lately
What Is “Practice Each and Every Moment?”
Awareness of What Is Going on Each and Every Moment
Aspiration to Frame the Present Moment
Actualization: Making It Real
An Example of Practice Each and Every Moment
Lifetime Growth and Learning
My Practice Hasn’t Been Very Good Lately
Fairly often, I hear someone reflecting on their Buddhist practice and expressing a sense of inadequacy about it. They might say, “My practice hasn’t been very good lately.” Usually, this is because their life has been very busy, or because of significant health issues. Whenever I hear someone imply that their practice is inadequate because of their life circumstances, it makes me very sad – not only for their sake, but because I think to myself, “How have I failed to convey the essence of practice, which is how you live each and every moment of whatever life you have?”
Usually, when people evaluate their practice, they call to mind what I call “formal practice.” Formal practice involves activities with a particular form – practice you can look at and recognize as Buddhist practice, including attending Sangha events, going to silent retreats, doing Dharma study, consulting with a teacher, or participating in ceremonies. Even zazen – seated meditation – is a “form.”
All these forms support and enrich our practice. However, they are not the most important aspect of it. The most important aspect is how you live each moment. When it comes to this most important aspect of practice, there are no circumstances which can possibly obstruct it. You can practice every moment on your death bed. You can practice every moment in a busy life raising small kids. You can practice every moment in the midst of a demanding career. You can practice every moment in a life constrained by chronic pain or illness. You can practice every moment in life circumstances largely dictated by financial difficulty. You can practice in prison. Nothing whatsoever disqualifies you or makes your practice one iota less legitimate.
Practice in these kinds of situations can be difficult, but only because you don’t usually get to avail yourself of the supportive and regenerative aspects of practice, like spending time with Sangha, listening to the teachings, or sharing the space of silence with others.
The message that “the essence of practice is how you live each moment” is not just about people in busy or challenging lives having to practice every moment instead of doing formal practice. This practice is the most important thing for all of us. If you attend Sangha or enjoy contemplating the Dharma while listening to a talk or podcast, or feel lovely during your zazen, but then when that activity is over you think you’re not practicing anymore, that is very unfortunate. You are not only giving up the precious opportunity to practice during 90% of your waking hours, you’re missing the most essential aspect of the Dharma: How we show up for this very life.
Think of “practice each and every moment” as the “other 90%” of practice for many of us, and if your life circumstances do not allow you to do much formal practice, maybe this is almost 100% of your practice.
In this episode I will talk about what it means to practice each and every moment, breaking it down into three essential aspects. Then I offer an example of how such practice might look in everyday life. In the next episode I will continue this discussion.
What Is “Practice Each and Every Moment?”
What is “practice each and every moment?” It means allowing every choice you make to be informed by your deepest aspirations. The opposite of practice is living according to karma. Karma is the universal law of behavioral cause-and-effect, and your personal karma is the sum total of your past choices and experiences as manifested in your body, speech, and mind. Some karma is positive, but much of it is reactionary or unconscious. Simply allowing yourself to be carried along by karma often leads to the perpetuation of negative habits and mind states. When we live according to karma, we essentially follow the path of least resistance, remaining trapped in patterns that may not be taking full advantage of this precious human life.
Alternatively, we can practice, which means allowing every choice we have to be shaped by our deepest aspirations. We all share deepest aspirations, although each of us has our own character, interests, and circumstances: To contribute to the world by fulfilling our responsibilities, giving the best we can, by leaving behind well-adjusted children, knowledge, innovation, or a job well done; to be fully awake for our lives and appreciative of the time we have; to be compassionate and forgiving; to live with self-awareness and to harm others as little as possible. To know who we really are, and to manifest authentically. To awaken to Reality-with-a-Capital-R and experience the liberation promised by the Buddhas. The list could go on.
As I envision it, practice each and every moment has three aspects: Awareness, Aspiration, and Actualization. This is practice you take with you anywhere, so you might think of this as having “Triple A” on your side when you navigate the days and nights of your life.
Awareness of What Is Going on Each and Every Moment
In order to live according to your deepest aspirations, you have to be aware of what’s going on – around you, as well as within you. In Zen, we call this being “mindful,” and we think of it as the practice we’re doing whenever we’re not on the meditation seat. I’ve done a number of episodes on mindfulness, including Episode 7 – Beyond Mindfulness: The Radical Practice of Undivided Presence and Episode 80 – Four Foundations of Mindfulness Practice and Similarities in Zen. The basic idea is to be as aware as possible as we go about our daily lives.
There are different levels and types of awareness, but it’s not necessary to overthink the practice of mindfulness. I find it helpful to simply ask myself at any given moment, “Am I undivided?” Much of the time, the answer to this question will be, “No.” Some part of me will be anticipating something that might happen in the future, or analyzing some situation that bears little or no relationship to where I currently am. Some part of me may be resisting my current circumstances, thinking, “I don’t like this,” or “I shouldn’t have to experience this.” If something particularly upsetting or exciting is happening in my life, I may be so absorbed in thinking about it that I’m largely oblivious to anything else.
When I notice I’m divided, then, I bring my attention to what’s actually going on. The Sanskrit Buddhist term translated as “mindfulness” is “sati,” which means “to recall” or “remember.” Mindfulness means to remember what’s going on. There may be a place and time to plan, anticipate, analyze, and all the rest, but most of the time I want to be experiencing my life as it’s happening, for its own sake. Mindfulness isn’t just limited to what you can see and hear in your immediate environment, either. It includes mindfulness of your own mental states, and the presence or absence of spiritual hindrances or factors of enlightenment.
One classic method for maintaining mindfulness once you have remembered – once you are no longer so divided – is to become aware of your breathing for a while. There are many other practices for cultivating mindfulness, including Nyoho, or making even our smallest, mundane actions accord with the Dharma, which I discuss in episodes 87 and 88. It’s something you can practice wherever you are, whatever you are doing. You can practice mindfulness when you’re driving, washing the dishes, changing diapers, sitting through chemotherapy, or having a conversation.
Aspiration to Frame the Present Moment
In our practice each and every moment, mindfulness is cultivated for its own sake (to be awake for and appreciative of our life), but it’s also a critical element in living by choice instead of by karma. Once we have remembered where we are and noticed what we’re doing, we recall our deepest aspirations. Such aspirations frame the present moment, orienting us and giving us guidelines for our behavior or directions in which to move.
In Buddhism, our deepest aspirations are described in many different ways. We have the moral precepts which help us maintain harmonious and respectful relationships and also help us study the self. We have the paramitas, or perfections, of generosity, ethical behavior, energy, tolerance, concentration, and wisdom. We have the brahmaviharas, or the four sublime social attitudes of a bodhisattva: Giving, kind speech, beneficial action, and identity action (or, “being in the same boat with living beings”). There’s the bodhisattva ideal itself – beings who devote themselves to awakening, but vow to remain in the world until all other beings are also liberated from suffering.
It’s all well and good to work toward ideals of being a good person with some degree of equanimity, but what makes our aspirations Zen (or Buddhist)? Buddhist aspirations include being a good, moral, generous person, but they go beyond this. We want to awaken to Reality-with-a-Capital-R because to do so liberates us from suffering – both gross and subtle – in a deep and profound way. It also vastly increases our capacity to help others. We want to understand the nature of dukkha and how to let go of it; to realize for ourselves how we (and all beings and things) are empty of any enduring, independent, inherent self-nature; to perceive suchness, or how everything is precious just as it is because of emptiness.
Having a teacher, doing Dharma study, and doing meditation retreats help us clarify and maintain our aspirations about awakening. However, we live our lives in Reality-with-a-Capital-R, so “enlightenments” large and small are possible anytime, anywhere. Practice each and every moment means paying keen attention to our direct experience – investigating, questioning, looking deeper. If we are practicing, we try not to dismiss anything. We try to avoid thinking, “Oh, I’ve seen this before,” or “There’s nothing worth paying attention to here.”
Part of our difficulty in maintaining our aspirations each and every moment is the fact that we discount our daily life, figuring there’s nothing profound to be learned there. However, many celebrated “moments of awakening” in Zen literature involve someone waking up while doing something completely mundane: Crossing a bridge, sweeping, carrying a bucket of water, or having an apparently ordinary verbal exchange with someone.
In a silent Zen retreat, you are asked to pay intense attention to each and every thing as if enlightenment is shining right through it, whether that’s eating, brushing your teeth, chopping a carrot, chanting, the feeling of the sunshine on your face, the sound of the wind in the trees, or a tiny bug crawling across the Zendo floor. There’s nothing special about the activities and experiences in a Zen retreat in this respect; enlightenment shines through your child’s face, an overlong work meeting, driving your car, or your mug of tea.
Of course, it’s extremely easy to lose mindfulness and forget our aspirations as we go about our daily lives, especially if we have many responsibilities or are facing challenges. However, this does not mean “the other 90%” of our life – when we’re not engaged in formal practice – is an inferior venue for awakening. Yes, in some ways it’s tougher because there are more distractions than in formal practice settings, but that means whatever mindfulness or aspiration we’re able to maintain in our daily life is strong and durable.
Actualization: Making It Real
The third aspect of practice each and every moment is actualization. You’ve become aware of what’s going on and recalled your aspirations, now what? If practice ended there – well, even then it wouldn’t be a bad thing, but you might end up a little more dissatisfied than before you started practicing, if you’re just carrying around a bunch of aspirations and ideals with greater awareness of how you fall short of fulfilling them!
To “actualize” means “to make actual or real; turn into action or fact.”[i] How do we do this? Formal Buddhist practice includes all kinds of teachings and tools relevant to actualization – to bringing about real change, and gaining a direct, personal experience of what the teachings are pointing to. Actually, just about any formal practice I can think of – meditation, study, spending time with Sangha, ceremony, anything – supports and encourages all three aspects of moment-by-moment practice: Awareness/mindfulness, aspiration, and actualization. The three aspects are rarely delineated when discussing Zen practices, as anything done wholeheartedly partakes of all three.
How can we actualize our aspirations outside of formal practice? During “the other 90-100%” of our lives?
There are doubtless many ways to answer this question, but I think it comes down to finding and utilizing our moments of choice. I described this process as it happens during zazen in Episode 250, where I suggested much of what goes through our head is beyond our conscious control. Thoughts, feelings, and impulses simply arise. We find ourselves caught up in them, only partially aware of what’s going on in the moment, but then, mysteriously, we wake up from the dream of thought. Our awareness expands, including not only what we were just thinking about but also our physical posture, how we are feeling, what’s going on around us, and our aspirations. This is a moment of choice. What do we do with that choice? Do we allow karma to carry us forward, or do we pause and look for a way to fulfill our deepest aspirations?
Our fleeting moments of choice are, you might say, “where the rubber meets the road” in terms of practice. In other words, this is where practice becomes real, or manifested. How do you live this very life? All the formal practices that support actualization simply create conducive conditions; ultimately, it comes down to what you choose to do right here, right now.
Buddhism gives you basic guidelines on which to build your aspirations, but it doesn’t give you specifics about what choices to make moment by moment in your life. It can’t. Every circumstance you face is unique, and you are unique. No one can see inside your head. No one knows what it’s like to be you, or how your brain and body work. If you want to practice, every day of your life is a journey you are taking all on your own. Fortunately, you can get guidance and support from others who are on somewhat similar journeys, but when it comes right down to it, no one else is looking out your eyes, or speaking your words, or experiencing your life.
An Example of Practice Each and Every Moment
My point about finding and utilizing your moment-by-moment choices is perhaps best illustrated by an example. Let’s say someone in your life – your child, parent, partner, co-worker, or friend – does something that upsets you. “How could they do that?” you think. You could just let your reactions unfold from there. Maybe you justify yourself, express your anger, or try to get the other person to apologize or change. Karma will carry you through the dance, causing you to be more self-centered than you would like, or constraining your ability to interact with the other person in a fruitful and compassionate way.
Alternatively, let’s say you notice your upset and your awareness expands a little, giving you a moment of choice. You take a moment to center yourself in your breathing and try to be mindful. You notice your body tensing up with frustration, your thoughts racing as you imagine ways to convey to this person how upset you are. You notice the facial expression and behavior of the other person, and how they also seem distraught, or tense. As soon as we are mindful, we are not entirely caught up. Even though you’re pretty sure you’re right, a bit of mindfulness allows you to recognize the other person probably thinks the same thing, or they if they realize they were at least partially in the wrong, they’re probably feeling defensive. You remember that things are complicated, and your perceptions are not synonymous with reality.
Then you remind yourself of your deepest aspirations. In this case, it might be harmony, compassion, equanimity, care, love, and maintaining this relationship. It isn’t necessary to review your intentions at length, although that might be helpful in certain circumstances. Mostly you can simply go, at least in the moment, with a “felt sense” of wanting to minimize harm and maximize happiness for everyone involved.
Your next significant moment of choice (there have actually been all kinds of moments already) is when you decide what to say. Do you let the first thing you think of come out of your mouth, or do you pause for a moment and see if you can find words that are more in accord with your deepest aspirations? Your karmic response might be to express anger, get defensive, say something snide or dismissive, or shut down. Can you soften or qualify your words, or make “I” statements?
As the interaction with the other person unfolds, it’s very unlikely that they immediately and sincerely understand your concern and apologize and change their behavior. When an impasse remains, you have another moment of choice. Do you keep restating your case, driven by a need to be right, or do you ask them a meaningful question? Do you dwell on your upset, or do you try to connect with your vulnerability and need for respect, or your need to know the other person is safe, or whatever is most relevant.
After the interaction, however it turns out, you have another choice. Do you perseverate on the conflict for the rest of the day, or do you set the thoughts aside as best you can and pay mindful attention to what you’re doing?
Lifetime Growth and Learning
It’s not so easy to even find the moments of choice, let alone take advantage of them when you notice them, and learn to make new choices. That’s a fascinating part of practice. It involves lots of experimentation, making mistakes, careful observation of cause and effect, and creativity. It’s helpful to bring a spirit of determined inquiry to this moment-by-moment experiential practice, as if you’re a scientist, engineer, or inventor trying to figure out how something works. What works to turn your mind toward a more positive course? How do you actually manage to let go of preoccupying thoughts and emotions? What works to allow you to stay centered in the here and now so you can respond authentically to others?
It’s easy to end up carrying around a list of “shoulds” in your head and simply beating yourself up with them. We often try to fulfill our aspirations through sheer force of will. If our mind is going down a negative path, we simply think to ourselves, “Stop it!” and expect things to change. We nag ourselves internally to let things go, but it doesn’t seem to help. We tell ourselves to stay centered next time someone upsets us, but once again we get flustered and lose track of what we really wanted to say to them.
In our each and every moment practice, we need to be aware not only of what we’re experiencing or responding to, but also of how we’re trying to practice with it. Are we trying the same thing over and over, imagining that gritting our teeth and really meaning it this time will open new possibilities for our actions of body, speech, and mind? Or are we trying new things and learning from what does or doesn’t work?
In our example about an interaction with someone in your life who has just upset you, maybe you keep trying not to express anger in such situations, but time and time again it just comes out anyway. Instead of just feeling like you’re failing in this regard, maybe you try doing regular metta practice for the person when you’re not with them. Or maybe you call something to mind before speaking, like times when this person is funny, affectionate, or kind. Or recall how sad or scared you felt when your parent would yell at you when you were a child. Or maybe you put your hand on your heart in the middle of an interaction to calm you and help you connect with your deepest aspirations. Using the attitude of scientist or an engineer, think of this as a problem which can be solved. There is a way to respond differently, you just have to find it.
The example I’ve been discussing may lead you to think that “practice each and every moment” is just karma work, which is about understanding and taking responsibility for the karma you have ended up with – in practical terms, changing your actions of body, speech, and mind. I discussed karma work at length in Episode 234 – Spiritual Inquiry Part 4: Investigating and Resolving Karmic Issues. That episode led into a discussion of what I call “awakening work,” which involves striving for a direct, personal experience of the deeper truths of our existence – truths we share with all life. Practice each and every moment, in the midst of everyday life, can also be awakening work. I will talk about this in Part 2, as well as explaining why I have been emphasizing “choice” so much when the self is empty of inherent, enduring self-nature. Who is choosing?
[i] ACTUALIZE Definition & Usage Examples | Dictionary.com
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